Hi there Falcon Family! Coach David here with something that might be bothering people seeking to make changes in the way they’re living (for whatever reason). A fairly common thing this time of year.
Let’s think about your friends. For most of us, they’re someone you can’t remember ever not knowing. Or someone we work with. Maybe someone you’ve known since grade-school or college. Maybe a neighbor or someone you met through social activities. They’re almost never someone you only know because you go out drinking with them. Or go out to eat with them. Not saying you can’t make friends at a bar, but usually, if the only thing you have in common is drinking, it’s not a friendship that lasts too long.
If you were hanging out with someone you consider a real friend, and you told them you wanted to drink less, or improve how you’re eating, do you think they’d no longer want to hang with you? Turns out your mom knew a thing or two when she’d say “If that’s the only reason they’re your friend, they were never really your friend to begin with.”
I have perfect evidence of this in my own life. I played softball with the same group of people forever. We’d go out for beers afterward. When I started working with a nutrition coach and started monitoring what I eat and drinking less, I still went with them (they are my friends, after all!) and no one said, “let’s not hang with him, he’s not fun any more.” I still see these guys, we’re still very close, we still play poker (where there’s also drinking), and I still go, and everyone still has a great time. No one even really busts my chops for not drinking anything, or not housing a burger or a bowl of mixed nuts. And this is a group of world-class chop busters. Every once in a while, someone will say something to me (“he can’t eat that, it’ll add .05% body fat to him”), and then someone else (not me!) will say, “hey, Pfeffer, take off your shirt and show them what’s up” thus busting both parties’ chops. The beer isn’t the tie that binds, friendship runs deeper than that.
My point is, there will always be temptations. If you’re trying to change, something HAS to change. If someone is on you for wanting to make yourself better, that says a lot more about them than it does you. You can still go out and have fun. You can drink a Diet Coke, or seltzer with a mix-in and be fine. You can say no to food that’s offered. No one is going to remember it. No one will say years later after a fun night out, “hey, remember that night, it was so fun! Except for so-and-so not drinking.”
Worry less. Consult your coach. You hired a coach for a reason! We’re here to help you. We WANT to help you!