Am I Broken?

Share This

Am I Broken?

In 2016, I married my soulmate, someone I waited 48 yrs to find. We took a 2-week dream honeymoon in Italy. I was the happiest I had ever been. I was also the most depressed. I had gained so much weight even though I was working out a minimum of 5 days a week. I was doing CrossFit and lifting weights, yet the scale did not budge. I could not understand nor could I stand to even look at my wedding pictures from the happiest day of my life.

I’ll never forget the day. 

I was poolside in Italy trying to hide my body when I said to myself, enough is enough. At that moment and from that pool chair, I sent a FB message to a nutrition coach begging for help. I told him I didn’t understand what was wrong with me. Maybe I had an underactive thyroid. Maybe I was in perimenopause so my hormones were out of whack or maybe my metabolism was just broken. 

From that pool chair in Italy on my honeymoon, I went back and forth with him and he kept telling me it was all about food and I was going to be just fine. He told me that if I gave him a chance, he’d prove it to me. 

So, I did. 

I submitted payment and we set a start date for when I returned from my glorious Italian honeymoon. 

I was excited, I was scared and I admit, I was totally clueless as to how this was going to work for me – but I put my fears and doubts aside and I dove in head first. 

I learned SO much while on this journey. I learned I didn’t need to be perfect. That I could eat mostly what I wanted if I just planned for it accordingly. That if I was consistently making the best choices for me and my goals, a weekend away or vacation or lunch out with the girls was not going to ‘undo’ my hard work. I learned to lean on my coach for accountability and a swift kick in the butt when I needed it most.  I learned that my coach wasn’t a mind-reader and that if I was struggling or needed help, I needed to reach out to him to ask for it and when I did, I got all the help and support I needed. 

I also learned, and this was the hardest part, that not everyone in my life understood why and what I was doing. Peer pressure not only happens when you’re a teenager, it happens at all ages. I learned that sometimes it was just easier giving in than having to explain why I wasn’t having a 3rd drink. This was hard and some people in my life didn’t understand or support me. I remember feeling left out when I wasn’t invited to places because it was assumed I wouldn’t be drinking and if I’m not drinking then how much fun would I be? I remember the backhanded comments and I learned that my journey is personal and that it’s OK if other people don’t understand why or what I’m doing. It’s not theirs to understand,  and I learned to be OK with that.

With the support and guidance from my coach, I grew so much as a person during our time together. It was also this experience that led me to change careers, retire from corporate America and go full time helping others experience and achieve the same things I did with my coach. 

Most of all, I learned that I am indeed NOT broken and I will show you that you’re not either. We are beautiful, strong, and capable. We just need guidance, we need someone to believe in us and we need someone in our corner to educate, advocate and lead us in the direction we need to go. My coach did that for me, it changed my life and now I do that for others.

Meet The Author

Share This

Trending Now

Recent Posts

You May Also Like

author placeholder image
author placeholder image